Me and "Earl"...

So having obtained my second tattoo on Friday night, I am sure I will soon meet an ex-con named Earl. He will think I am tough (... actually, "tuff"...) because of my 'body art', and he will love my free spirit. We will ride across the country on his bike - smoking, drinking at pool halls, and holding up convenience stores when we run out of money. I will lose tons of weight and dress all in leather and chains. Earl will be overweight with a beard, and although I won't find him physically attractive, our mutual love of tattoos and piercings will keep us together. Until one day he gets picked up for a bar fight and sent back to prison. I will go home to await his parole hearing. And I will grow old and saggy and wish I'd never gotten so many tattoos -- since an eighty year old with a sunshine on her flabby back is not nearly as hot as a thin, 25 year old dressed in black leather and chains, riding on the back of a bike with a guy named Earl drinking, smoking, playing pool, and committing felonies...... but for now, I'm pretty psyched.